We Love Kids, but…

Posted On July 18, 2009

Filed under Misc

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The topic of children at a wedding is a controversial one. Some people believe strongly that children should be part of the day, while other believe they should stay at home. Like us, I’m sure most peoples’ opinions are a per wedding decision. We’ve been to weddings where we couldn’t imagine what it would have been like not seeing the adorable flowers girl forget to line the aisle with petals, or the ring bearer swinging the pillow around by the ribbon tied tightly around the rings. However, we’ve also been to weddings were an uncomfortable baby has cried in the middle the vows or a bored toddler talked loudly throughout the ceremony.

Every couple decides what is best for their wedding based on their venue, their guests, the time of day etc. Mr Frenchie and I made the unpopular decision, early on, that we are not going to have children in our wedding and we we’re not going to invite children under a certain age. As you know our wedding will take place at a winery and will take place completely outside. In our opinion, our venue does not lend itself to young children.

We have a few friends with babies (whom we absolutely adore) that are have shared with us how excited they are to have a night/weekend for just the two of them. However, we also have a few friends who really want to bring their children along. We understand that finding a sitter cannot always be easy, we’ve spent many nights hanging out with friends at their houses, instead of going out, so they didn’t have to hire a sitter. We also understand that, for some, that means they will not be able to attend our wedding. But, if we bend our rule for one couple we have to do it for everyone, so we’re standing our ground.

To get “the word” out we decided to approach any opposition on a case by case basis. We made sure to put the names of all the invited parties on the invitations and decided that if someone RSVP’d for more we would just explain to them “our policy”. A couple guests have emailed us, before RSVP’ing, to ask and we’ve responded to each as diplomatically as possible. One couple has been less understanding than the others, but again we are standing our ground.

Have you decided not to invite children to your wedding? How did you get “the word” out?


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